Thursday, November 23, 2006

Martha Stewart "Living" is for the Dead

I read an issue of Martha Stewart Living recently. Hmmm. Let me see, how can I put this... It's not that I didn't think the magazine wasn't fantastic, or that my home couldn't greatly benefit from Martha's billion-dollar ideas; it's just that, well, I have a job, and a life with family and friends, and I need to sleep and eat and drive places, so I just don't have time to wash old sweaters and sew the shrunken wool into stuffed dog toys, baby gifts and Christmas ornaments. It's a very good idea, as you can see, and I'll add it to my to-do list, but there are simply some things that I need to do ahead of that. Like about 106,117 things.

Before I sew old wool into gifts, I had really better have published a novel, patented a few inventions and remodeled my home.

Maybe after I learn Aramaic I'll get right on the shrunken wool. By then I'll be dead, but I can make heaven more beautiful with woolen crafts. I've got some old white sweaters I'll hang on to.

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